Archive for the ‘Links’ Category

Never mind the French — we Jews have our parenting secrets too. If I ever write another book, this is it.  Bringing Up the Kindele: A Jewish Mother Shares the Secrets Behind Raising Children Who Don’t Listen, Won’t Shut Up and Might Never, Ever Leave Your Side.

When Helaine Olen gave birth, she knew nothing about bringing up children. At first she tried to go along with the parenting flow around her, going from Music Together sessions to RIE classes, all in the hopes of raising the perfect child. But when her son foiled her yet again by falling asleep in his car seat and missing class, Helaine decided to call her mother on her cell to pass the time. Listening to her mom’s ten-minute soliloquy-like response to the polite question “How are you?,” Olen suddenly had a parenting epiphany at the exact moment her mother said, “I didn’t want to worry you but I had a biopsy yesterday. Don’t worry. Everything’s fine. They don’t think it’s malignant. I didn’t call you. I didn’t want to worry you. What’s wrong with the baby that he fell asleep in the car? Is he sick? Does he have a fever? Did you feed him?”

She did know how to parent a child, one who could be self-obsessed and self-sacrificing at the same time, as well as in love with the sound of his own voice and uniquely oblivious to any social cue.

Olen turned to the wisdom of her mother, grandmother and generations of women from an ancient tribe before her in an effort to raise the perfect child. And now that her children have graduated from second grade, she’s willing to share the secrets of her mothering success with you. Topics addressed include: Read on »

Pound Foolish is on Amazon! Go take a look!

I’m blogging once a day for Babble’s Strollerderby blog. Come visit me!

As we end the work week, I’d like to revisit an interview The New York Times interview ran recently with children’s writer Rebecca Stead.

Stead, the author of the wonderful Newbery Medal winning children’s novel “When You Reach Me,” chatted with the Times about for a feature about what her typical Sunday with her husband and two boys is like. It’s meant to be a look at family togetherness (We buy bagels together! We watch The Simpsons together!) but what struck me was the feeling of overwhelming loneliness that pervaded the piece. In less than 600 words, Stead either mentions or alludes to her husband’s more normal non-presence in her children’s lives twice. “My husband generally works a lot during the week, so Sunday is also our day when he’s around,” she says early in the chat, later adding that “Sunday is probably the only day when we always, always eat together.”

Stead’s not alone. Survey data demonstrates that Americans who still have jobs in 2010 are working much harder, often for less money than in the past, with productivity output per worker surging. But that comes with a painful human cost. Many of my friends who are employed in full-time jobs have, in the past year, vanished from both my life and the lives of their families. I miss them, but their families miss them more. Just yesterday, two separate mom pals told me that their husbands were never home before 8:30 at the earliest. “The children are not handling it well,” confided one (who works full-time and then some herself), while the other admitted that her husband rarely got off work before their kids were asleep. Neither felt they could complain or do much to alter the situation. They were, they both admitted, simply grateful their spouses had a steady paycheck.

So what about you? Are you or your spouse seeing less of your family, kids and friends than you did prior to the recession? If yes, how are you and your loved ones handling it?